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    Everything you need to know about Ramadan Fasting During Pregnancy

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    To the Mama who isn’t Practicing

    Reaping a richer Ramadan with children

    Asmaa Hussein - Ruqaya's Bookshelf

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Home Islamic Gems

Ramadan Stories Diary Entry 3: In Search of Lailatul-Sleep – Err, I Mean Qadr by Nafisa Rahimi

In Search of the Night of Power

Nafisa Rahimi by Nafisa Rahimi
05/04/2021
in Featured, Interesting reads, Islamic Calendar, Islamic Gems, Motherhood
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Every night is a heavy burden of guilt. 

A huge ball of it, fisted into a knot, weighing in on my soul; anxious butterflies going berserk as I carry out my motherly duties. This is how my Ramadan slips away, in the silence of the night or during the chaos of the day. 

Today for example, I run around my usual hamster wheel, doing the same groundhog daily rituals whilst fitting in prayers, whispering random zikrs for a few seconds before I get distracted again, and of course there’s that dratted phone. (Damn that Martin Cooper!)

So whilst I prepare for this odd night, all slow and cumbersome, preparing to face my guilt head on, I manage to do a little ibadah in the dead of night. By some odd miracle, my Baba is sleeping undisturbed! I start to speed up my ibadah in increments, quietly pausing in case I have to dash up. But no, he continues to leave me to get on. By Allah’s mercy, I even manage some reading, Allahu Akbar!

Before too long, my eyes start to sting and droop. I’m ashamed to say I’m done. So, I prepare to rest, making a mental promise to squeeze some more worship before Fajr. But we plan and Allah plans and His plans are infinitely better. What do I find when I approach my bed? 

Shiny, beady eyes peeking up at me, big grin at the ready, arms and legs poised like a cub about to pounce. Yup, my little gentle giant was waiting up for me. Just in time to not let me sleep. 

I was so shattered but I continued to play the doting ma, picked the boy up and my guilty heart just melted. I showered his chubby face with kisses, rubbed my nose along the length of his, squeezed him close to me in a hug, closed my guilt off and suddenly my heart started to make dua for him. May Allah protect him always. Ameen. May Allah grant him shifaa (cure) from all ailments. Ameen. May Allah give him success in both worlds. Ameen. May Allah protect our bond always. Ameen. May Allah keep him in peace. Ameen. I punctuated each ‘ameen’ with a kiss and baba was loving it! He had an expectant gummy smile, waiting for the ‘ameen kiss’. 

It was at that moment I had a mama-epiphany. I suddenly gave in to the guilt. I gave in to my natural calling and simply accepted that this is it. That this, me playing with my baby is an act of worship itself. How can it not be when this miracle was given to us as a gift by the Only One Who Could? The content in my baba’s eyes was all the testament I needed. The guilt that I kept fighting, was just not ok. 

Every day I battled this guilt as if it was jihad itself, fighting through the mundane and hiding Ramadan away, somewhere in the creases of my heart. Not fasting, not praying enough, not reading enough, not understanding enough. But enough is enough. I am a mama, and that is it. That is more than enough. For now. 

My very being, my Self, the things I do as a mama, wife, sister, daughter – all the extras and the mundane – it is all Ibadah, acts of worship. Bismillah, In the Name of Allah, from the beginning to the end. 

So, don’t beat yourself up mamas, if you are a Guilt-Carrier. The guilt itself is a reflection of the worship you intend and you will be rewarded by your intentions. So, I leave you with this quote by Ibn Al-Qayyim (may Allah be pleased with him):

“Perhaps you might be asleep while the doors of Heaven are knocking with tens of supplications for you, by a poor person you aided or a sad person you cheered up or a distressed person you brought relief to. Therefore, do not underestimate doing good at all.” 

–Ibn Al-Qayyim (RA)

By Nafisa Rahimi

Co-Founder of Muslim Mamas, Founder of Super Smart Learners and an award-winning podcast – Not Another Mum Pod. Nafisa graduated from the University of Birmingham in Applied Theological Studies and completed her PGCE in RE and English from the School of Education in Birmingham. She is a self-confessed workaholic living in London with her four children and husband. Nafisa enjoys writing, eating out, travelling and hanging out with the sitcom ‘Friends’.

Museum of London Project Series

The Covid-19 pandemic 2020 was having a huge impact on many aspects of the daily lives of Londoners. The Museum of London thought it was important to record these experiences in order to share and learn from them in the future. One aspect they wanted to capture is the experience of families observing Ramadan during that time. They were interested in how this experience differed to the experience of families in previous years, and how families were adapting to observe Ramadan.

All four audio diary entries and the interview with Saami reflecting on lockdown Ramadan 2020 are now part of the Museum of London’s Permanent Collection, forming a part of British history! What an honour this has been!

Saami and I (and our family) cannot express how touched we have been by this whole experience. We hope you enjoy listening to these and do share with your friends and families.

To listen to this podcast, visit: https://notanothermumpod.com/pod-gems/

Mamas who are feeling inadequate due to being unable to pray or due to the demanding role of motherhood, and are looking for effective, achievable acts of worship, have a go at the following:

If you’re feeling inadequate because you’re not able to pray in these final days of Ramadan, try these:

1. Get a treasure in Jannah. Say: لَا حَوْلَ وَلَا قُوَّةَ إِلَّا بِاللَّهِ
The Prophet (s) said, “Be frequent in saying ‘There is no might or power except by Allah, (Lā ḥawla wa lā quwwata illā billāh)’ For verily, it is a treasure from the treasures of Paradise.’” [سنن الترمذی :3601]

2. Get a palace in Jannah. Say: Surah al-Ikhlas (10 times)
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever recites Surah al-Ikhlas ten times, Allah will build a palace for him in paradise.” Umar (r) said, “Then we will have many palaces in Jannah?” The Prophet (s) replied, “Allah has even more and better than that.” [السلسلة الصحيحة:589]

3. Landscape Jannah. Say: سُبْحَانَ الله وَالْحَمْدُ لله وَلاَ إله إِلاَّ الله وَالله أَكْبَرُ
The Prophet (s) said, “I met Ibrahim on the Night of Ascension (Al-Isra), and he said to me, ‘O Muhammad, convey my greetings to your Ummah, and tell them that Jannah has a vast plain of pure soil and sweet water. It is a plain levelled land. The plants grow there by uttering: Subhan-Allah, Al-hamdu lillah, La ilaha illallah, and Allahu Akbar.” [السلسلة الصحيحة : 105]

Or say: سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ الْعَظِيمِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says ‘SubhanAllahil ‘adheemi wa bihamdihi’ a tree is planted for him in Paradise.” [سنن الترمذی:3465]

4. Get all your sins forgiven. Say: SubhanAllahi wa bihamdihi (100 times)
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says, ‘Subhan Allah wa bihamdihi,’ one hundred times a day, will be forgiven all his sins even if they were as much as the foam of the sea.” [صحیح البخاری: 6405]

Or say: Astaghfirullahal ladhee laa ilaha illaa huwal Hayyul Qayyoomu wa atoobu ilayh
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says أَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ الَّذِي لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ هُوَ الْحَىُّ الْقَيُّومُ وَأَتُوبُ إِلَيْهِ (I seek forgiveness from Allah, the One besides whom there is none worthy of worship, the Living, the Sustainer of all, and I repent to him), all his sins will be forgiven, even if he had fled from battle.” [Sunan Abi Dawud 1517]

5. Earn a thousand good deeds. Say: SubhanAllah (100 times)
The Prophet (s) said, “Is anyone amongst you powerless to earn one thousand good deeds every day? …. Say tasbeeh one hundred times and one thousand good deeds are recorded and one thousand sins are erased.” [صحیح مسلم:7027]

6. Fill the Scales. Say: Alhamdulillah
The Prophet (s) said, “Cleanliness is half of faith and al-Hamdu Lillah (Praise be to Allah) fills the scale.” [صحیح مسلم:223]

7. Fill the space between the sky and the earth. Say: Allahu Akbar
The Prophet (s) said, “Allahu Akbar fills what is between the sky and the earth.” [مسند احمد:22908]

8. Earn the reward of worshipping the entire night. Recite: The last two verses of Surah al-Baqarah.
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever recites the last two verses of Surat al-Baqarah at night, that will be sufficient for him.” [صحیح البخاری: 5051]
Ibn Hajar said, أَيْ أَجْزَأَتَا عَنْهُ مِنْ قِيَامِ اللَّيْلِ بِالْقُرْآنِ “Meaning, they will suffice him for qiyamul layl” [Fathul Bari]

9. Earn the reward of giving charity. Say: SubhanAllah, Alhamdulillah, Laa ilaha illAllah, Allahu Akbar.
The Prophet (s) said, “In the morning, charity is due from every bone in the body of every one of you. Every utterance of glorification (i.e., saying SubhanAllah) is an act of charity. Every utterance of praise (i.e., saying Alhamdulillah) is an act of charity, every utterance of profession of His Oneness (i.e., saying Laa ilaha illAllah) is an act of charity, every utterance of profession of His Greatness (i.e., saying Allahu Akbar) is an act of charity, enjoining good is an act of charity, forbidding what is disreputable is an act of charity, and two rak’ahs which one prays in the forenoon will suffice.” [صحیح مسلم:720]

10. Earn a mountain of reward. Give a date.
The Prophet (s) said, “If anyone gives as Sadaqa the equivalent of a date from honestly (earning) earned – because Allah accepts only what is pure – the Lord would accept it with His Right Hand, and even if it is a date, it would grow in the Hand of the lord, as one of you fosters his colt, till it becomes bigger than a mountain.” [صحیح مسلم: 1014]

11. Want to be called from the gates of Jannah? Give a pair.
The Prophet (s) said, “The one who spends a pair in the way of Allah will be summoned from the gates of the Garden and told, ‘O slave of Allah, this is good.” [صحیح البخاری]

12. Share this khayr
The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever introduces a good practice that is followed after him, will have a reward for that and the equivalent of their reward, without that detracting from their reward in the slightest.” [صحیح مسلم: 1017]

 

 

Nafisa Rahimi

Nafisa Rahimi

By Nafisa Rahimi Co-Founder of Muslim Mamas, Super Smart Learners English (a unique educational programme) and an award-winning 'Best Podcast 2020' - Not Another Mum Pod. The audio Ramadan diaries are now a Permanent Collection of the Museum of London. Nafisa has recently been named in Techmae's ‘Woman Spotlight’. Nafisa's pods regularly make waves, frequently ranking in Apple Podcast charts worldwide (no.12 in Sweden and 13 in UK ). Nafisa faces difficult topics head-on in an attempt to grab the mic, and address Muslim-related issues with authentic Muslim voices. Nafisa lives in London with her four children and husband. She enjoys writing, eating out, travelling and hanging out with 'Friends'! Read all about it here: https://linktr.ee/Nafisa.Rahimi        

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Comments 9

  1. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    Below are the dates for the odd nights in the last 10 days of Ramadan (if you started fasting on Tues 13th Apr)

    21st Night – Night of 2nd May
    23rd Night – Night of 4th May
    25th Night – Night of 6th May
    27th Night – Night of 8th May
    29th Night – Night of 10th May

    And… here are the dates for the odd nights in the last 10 days of Ramadan (if you started fasting on Wed 14th Apr)

    21st Night – Night of 3rd May
    23rd Night – Night of 5th May
    25th Night – Night of 7th May
    27th Night – Night of 9th May
    29th Night – Night of 11th May

    May Allah accept all our good deeds and efforts in these last 10 days! Ameen!

    Reply
  2. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    Powerful Tips for the Last 10 Nights of Ramadan

    1. All is Not Lost!
    Do not let your ‘performance’ until now affect your last 10 days. The moment of forgiveness could be today or anytime in the coming days! It is not all lost! If you sincerely wish it could have been better – Chin up and get ready to make it your best yet! Start with a positive, sincere intention!

    2. Understand
    Today, take a little time to read the Tafseer of Surah al-Qadr to understand what actually happens this night! You will feel its power & greatness so much more!

    3. 27th Night?
    Do not wait for the 27th Night to give it your “all”. The entire last 10 days should be your target. Stay up each night! Would you want to miss Laylatul Qadr even “by chance”?

    4. Follow the Sunnah
    Do not fall into any innovations/celebrations any masjid or culture might try to promote. Follow the Sunnah! The Prophet (sallAllahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) guided us simply: “Whoever stays up and prays on Laylat al-Qadr out of faith and in the hope of reward, his previous sins will be forgiven.”

    5. Prophetic Du’a
    Memorize and keep asking the dua’ taught by Rasulullah (sallAllahu ‘alaihi wa sallam): “Allaahumma innaka ‘afuwwun tuhibb al-‘afwa fa’affu ‘anni” (O Allaah, You are forgiving and You love forgiveness, so forgive me).

    6. Lots of Du’a
    Prepare a short dua’ list. Remember this is as awesome as it ever gets for a servant of Allah! The Night of Qadr, of Destiny! Consciously pick each and everything you crucially wish for in this dunya, in your deen, family, and in your aakhirah! Don’t forget to include the brothers and sisters around the world who are suffering and in grief!

    7. Relax
    Take brief naps during the day, if possible. Keep your stomach light and sleep as soon as you have prayed ‘isha. Do not delay! After a brief nap, refresh yourself and get ready for worship.

    8. Don’t Neglect your Family!
    Rasulullah made it a point to wake up his wives throughout these nights! And yes, your children are not too young to stay up some part of the night – if they can be allowed to play video games or watch TV, they can be inspired to be up atleast for sometime! Prepare them, make them excited, plan some activities for them to do!

    9. Look the Part
    The way we dress and prepare has a big effect on our psychology. Wear your best, perfume yourself, and feel the energy!

    10. Choose a Spot
    Whether in the Masjid or in your home, where you can have peace and solitude. Keep your mushaf, praying mat, and water at hand so that you are not distracted by constantly getting up for this or that.

    11. Social Media
    This is not the night to tweet pics or update FB statuses about how amazing the night is and how you are feeling & worshipping Allah! Let that be a secret between you & your Rabb! So switch off those phones, wifi, laptops and computers. Disconnect with the world, and connect with al-‘Afuww!

    12. Mix it up
    If you find yourself feeling sleepy, vary your acts of worship. Alternate between qiyaam, heartfelt dua’a, reading the Qur’an. Do not spend the night listening to lectures or recitations. Or do it only for a short while when you feel the sleep coming on!

    13. Patience is the Key
    The last 10 days might be tiring. You might still have work or school. This is the time to bear all that hardship, and keep firm sabr. Think how Allah has blessed you with this tremendous opportunity that might NEVER come again in your life again. If you knew for sure that this was your last Ramadan , if you knew certainly that Jannah was up for grabs, wouldn’t you sprint for it no matter what it takes?

    14. Most Importantly…
    Keep husn adh-dhann bi Allah (good expectations from Allah). When you ask, remember you are asking the Most Generous King. If you hope for the best, He will give you the best. Don’t hold back. Trust in Him, pour out your heart in front of Him, and let no doubt, no barrier, no evil thoughts keep you away from ar-Rahman, ar-Raheem!

    Allahumma ballighna laylatal qadr..

    – Shamsiya Noorul Quloob

    Reply
  3. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    May Allah accept it from us all, ameen.

    Reply
  4. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    Add your top tips here and join the groups here to continue the conversation: https://muslimmamas.com/group/general-conversations/activity/

    You need to ‘Join Group’ and click on ‘Acitivity’ to see the posts by members.

    Salaams and welcome! Join our new conversations and create your own. Remember, these groups are created for you and you can start your own threads, make friends, invite people etc. You can choose your own profile name and add anyone you like (as long as they are female and Muslim of course)! Here’s how to get started!

    1. Create your own profile by registering on the site (free) or logging in if you are already registered.
    2. Click on ‘Groups’
    3. Click on the small tab ‘JOIN GROUP’ first as otherwise you won’t be able to comment. Wait for it to load.
    4. You can then comment on the group, or scroll down and respond to other people’s posts. You can reply to their posts by clicking on the messaging icon, and then start typing.
    5. You can react to comments by starring them if you like them etc.
    You can click on ‘Members’ and see who else is in the group. You can request to ‘friend’ and ‘follow’ in the meantime.
    6. You can grow your list of friends and then invite these members to the other groups if you wanted to add them. It is like Facebook in that sense.

    Looking forward to seeing you all in all the groups! It’s a clean space, currently cosy and intimate with a different vibe. Add your friends and start talking! It is your ‘home away from home’.

    Reminder: Sometimes it may take a few seconds to load so do be patient. Click on ‘Activity’ if you can’t see the threads or refresh your page.

    Reply
  5. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    Some links to help you with yout ibadah:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkNbZUJBbXI
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psN1gCbTgLc&list=PLS582lB6EXGzN-12G9rILNM_PFNrKy7AP&index=5
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3vHW2h22WE-pNi5WJtRIjg

    Other related articles:
    https://muslimmamas.com/ramadan-stories-museum-of-london-project-diary-entry-1-lockdown-loss-by-nafisa-rahimi-mm-founder/

    https://muslimmamas.com/ramadan-stories-diary-entry-2-creature-comforts-by-nafisa-rahimi/

    https://muslimmamas.com/ramadan-stories-museum-of-london-project-diary-entry-4-lockdown-reflection-by-nafisa-rahimi/

    Reply
  6. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    As-Salamu Alaykum

    NEW! Complete Quran Audio Recitation by Mufti Ismail Menk

    Web Channel
    https://qurancentral.com/audio/mufti-ismail-menk/

    Apple Podcasts
    https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/mufti-menk-quran-audio/id1086314758

    Google Podcasts
    https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cucXVyYW5jZW50cmFsLmNvbS9hdWRpby9tdWZ0aS1pc21haWwtbWVuay9mZWVkLw%3D%3D

    Spotify Podcasts
    https://open.spotify.com/show/2OEBxBql4V2Z5mPghkhny0

    Android App
    https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.qurancentral

    Quran Central – A project by Muslim Central

    Feel free to forward to family and friends 🙂

    Reply
  7. Nafisa Rahimi says:
    2 years ago

    Mamas who are feeling inadequate due to being unable to pray or due to the demanding role of motherhood, and are looking for effective, achievable acts of worship, have a go at the following:

    If you’re feeling inadequate because you’re not able to pray in these final days of Ramadan, try these:

    1. Get a treasure in Jannah. Say: لَا حَوْلَ وَلَا قُوَّةَ إِلَّا بِاللَّهِ
    The Prophet (s) said, “Be frequent in saying ‘There is no might or power except by Allah, (Lā ḥawla wa lā quwwata illā billāh)’ For verily, it is a treasure from the treasures of Paradise.’” [سنن الترمذی :3601]

    2. Get a palace in Jannah. Say: Surah al-Ikhlas (10 times)
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever recites Surah al-Ikhlas ten times, Allah will build a palace for him in paradise.” Umar (r) said, “Then we will have many palaces in Jannah?” The Prophet (s) replied, “Allah has even more and better than that.” [السلسلة الصحيحة:589]

    3. Landscape Jannah. Say: سُبْحَانَ الله وَالْحَمْدُ لله وَلاَ إله إِلاَّ الله وَالله أَكْبَرُ
    The Prophet (s) said, “I met Ibrahim on the Night of Ascension (Al-Isra), and he said to me, ‘O Muhammad, convey my greetings to your Ummah, and tell them that Jannah has a vast plain of pure soil and sweet water. It is a plain levelled land. The plants grow there by uttering: Subhan-Allah, Al-hamdu lillah, La ilaha illallah, and Allahu Akbar.” [السلسلة الصحيحة : 105]

    Or say: سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ الْعَظِيمِ وَبِحَمْدِهِ
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says ‘SubhanAllahil ‘adheemi wa bihamdihi’ a tree is planted for him in Paradise.” [سنن الترمذی:3465]

    4. Get all your sins forgiven. Say: SubhanAllahi wa bihamdihi (100 times)
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says, ‘Subhan Allah wa bihamdihi,’ one hundred times a day, will be forgiven all his sins even if they were as much as the foam of the sea.” [صحیح البخاری: 6405]

    Or say: Astaghfirullahal ladhee laa ilaha illaa huwal Hayyul Qayyoomu wa atoobu ilayh
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever says أَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ الَّذِي لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ هُوَ الْحَىُّ الْقَيُّومُ وَأَتُوبُ إِلَيْهِ (I seek forgiveness from Allah, the One besides whom there is none worthy of worship, the Living, the Sustainer of all, and I repent to him), all his sins will be forgiven, even if he had fled from battle.” [Sunan Abi Dawud 1517]

    5. Earn a thousand good deeds. Say: SubhanAllah (100 times)
    The Prophet (s) said, “Is anyone amongst you powerless to earn one thousand good deeds every day? …. Say tasbeeh one hundred times and one thousand good deeds are recorded and one thousand sins are erased.” [صحیح مسلم:7027]

    6. Fill the Scales. Say: Alhamdulillah
    The Prophet (s) said, “Cleanliness is half of faith and al-Hamdu Lillah (Praise be to Allah) fills the scale.” [صحیح مسلم:223]

    7. Fill the space between the sky and the earth. Say: Allahu Akbar
    The Prophet (s) said, “Allahu Akbar fills what is between the sky and the earth.” [مسند احمد:22908]

    8. Earn the reward of worshipping the entire night. Recite: The last two verses of Surah al-Baqarah.
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever recites the last two verses of Surat al-Baqarah at night, that will be sufficient for him.” [صحیح البخاری: 5051]
    Ibn Hajar said, أَيْ أَجْزَأَتَا عَنْهُ مِنْ قِيَامِ اللَّيْلِ بِالْقُرْآنِ “Meaning, they will suffice him for qiyamul layl” [Fathul Bari]

    9. Earn the reward of giving charity. Say: SubhanAllah, Alhamdulillah, Laa ilaha illAllah, Allahu Akbar.
    The Prophet (s) said, “In the morning, charity is due from every bone in the body of every one of you. Every utterance of glorification (i.e., saying SubhanAllah) is an act of charity. Every utterance of praise (i.e., saying Alhamdulillah) is an act of charity, every utterance of profession of His Oneness (i.e., saying Laa ilaha illAllah) is an act of charity, every utterance of profession of His Greatness (i.e., saying Allahu Akbar) is an act of charity, enjoining good is an act of charity, forbidding what is disreputable is an act of charity, and two rak’ahs which one prays in the forenoon will suffice.” [صحیح مسلم:720]

    10. Earn a mountain of reward. Give a date.
    The Prophet (s) said, “If anyone gives as Sadaqa the equivalent of a date from honestly (earning) earned – because Allah accepts only what is pure – the Lord would accept it with His Right Hand, and even if it is a date, it would grow in the Hand of the lord, as one of you fosters his colt, till it becomes bigger than a mountain.” [صحیح مسلم: 1014]

    11. Want to be called from the gates of Jannah? Give a pair.
    The Prophet (s) said, “The one who spends a pair in the way of Allah will be summoned from the gates of the Garden and told, ‘O slave of Allah, this is good.” [صحیح البخاری]

    12. Share this khayr
    The Prophet (s) said, “Whoever introduces a good practice that is followed after him, will have a reward for that and the equivalent of their reward, without that detracting from their reward in the slightest.” [صحیح مسلم: 1017]

    Reply
  8. windsor says:
    2 years ago

    Aᴡ, this was an exceptionally niсe post. Taking the time and actᥙal effort to generate a
    good article… ƅut what can I say… I put things off a lot and don’t seem to get anything done.

    Reply
    • Nafisa Rahimi says:
      2 years ago

      Thank you for your lovely feedback. I think we all procastrinate in some way. Hope you are well and enjoying our articles on here.

      Reply

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